Let’s look at the process from another angle.
“Neuroception” coined by Dr. Stephen W. Porges, Ph.D. is how our bodies detect risk in the environment. He stated “our body reacts to features in the environment long before we are aware of them. we respond to stuff, but often we don’t know what we are responding to.”
Step 1: The body senses its environment as feelings in the body.
Neuroscientist Nina Bull, in her Attitude Theory noted that when the body perceives a stimulus, if not immediately released, the body holds onto it & that “trapped” sensation gets assigned an emotion.
Step 2: Feelings are internalized & translated into emotions.
Memory expert Dr. Peter Levine says that emotional memories are a somatic response of the body. When something pleasant/unpleasant happens to us, our subconscious mind catalogues the feeling of that moment. Anytime we feel that way again, that memory comes up.
Step 3: The body stores emotions to call up when similar feelings present.
William James said in 1890 “…the mere memory or imagination of the object may suffice to liberate the excitement. One may get angrier in thinking over one’s insult than at the moment of receiving it…” Memory can be exaggerated over time, assuming growing importance. If this memory is called up over a series of times it compounds.
Step 4: Repeated emotions grow stronger, i.e. where you focus expands.
When the brain perceives a glitch in the programming it creates a behavioral adjustment. As Dr. Levine notes these “survival based memories” become fixed & permanent very fast. When we’ve had an “unsuccessful” experience, that memory becomes locked in & our body wants to always go back to that place.
Step 5: Our behavior responds to adjust the negative emotion.
Dr. Dan Siegel, founder of the Mindsight Institute, summed up the science of this process in the following statement “Where attention goes (practice), neurofiring flows (creates a state of mind). With repeated activation of a state, states become traits through neuroplasticity.”
Step 6: Repeated behavioral response creates an automated reaction in the brain: a pattern.
So the process looks like this:
1: Our body elaborates the environment as a feeling.
2: Our physical feelings are translated into emotions.
3: Our body stores the emotion & calls it up any time when that sensation presents. (neurofiring)
4: Every time that emotion arises it grows stronger. (state)
5: Our behavior responds to adjust the negative emotion. (fight/flight/freeze mechanism)
6: The repeated behavioral response to our emotional state becomes a pattern. (trait)
Over time, a small incident can become a defining trait of our personality – without our conscious permission. What this means is that the “you” that you believe you are, is really a collection of learned response patterns.
The good news is that you can be relearned. It takes time, awareness & practice, but you can start responding to the world around you consciously. The millions of years of evolution prove successful because we are still alive. It’s now our job to learn how to evolve the conscious maneouvering mechanism of our own brains.
But how can you identify your subconscious patterns?
First: have you ever found yourself in a cyclical situation? Meaning…do you always seem to choose men who ignore? Do you always have to be the savior? Do you never ask for help? Any time there is a cycle of behavior, there is a founding belief at the root that is keeping you locked there. Remember what Dr. Siegel said…repeated action of a state becomes a trait.
Then look at your “definitions” of yourself, the things you believe to be true. “I am always, I would never, I don’t, I have to.” If you examine these definitions, you’ll find that they’re linked to actions of yours. The question we rarely ask ourselves is “WHY do i do that”? We just sort of assume that since we behave that way, that’s who we are. But those behaviors & actions are learned responses to external stimulus that we have fortified over time to the point that we believe we are what we do. If you can get to the underlying belief, you can change the behavior, & change the definition.
The first step to getting aware of the behaviors is to literally step outside of your definitions & your thoughts. Notice when you say to yourself “I would never…”, “I have to…”, “I’m a… kind of person”, “I can’t…” & ask yourself “WHY do I think that?”, “what makes me say that?”.
Put your subconscious thoughts on alert. Let your subconscious know that you’re checking its work. Remember, the subconscious works for you, it’s just been left alone with a blank check for all this time.
When you start questioning your own thoughts, you come to realize that you can be an observer of your thoughts. They are not you, they are a by-product. How can you be doing the thinking & the watching. The more you question your own thinking the more you can be critical about it.
When you start this habit, of questioning how you know the things you believe you know, pay attention to the memories that come up. Those are clues that your subconscious is serving up as explanations.
When you are served specific memories, go as far into the memory as possible. Remember that the brain experiences everything in the now, whether it is happening or not. Walk around in your memory, but this time as an adult. Feel what you were feeling in that moment & then try & put some context around it.
Is it possible that your parents were having a difficult day & were lashing out rather than you being categorically “bad”? If your dad was ignoring you, is it possible that he had his own crap going on that had nothing to do with you? Literally walk into your memories as the child & let the adult brain take it over. Rewrite that memory & rewrite how it ends. Forgive all of the people involved in the memory, starting with yourself.
Did you miss part 1 or part 2 ?
If you’re interested in learning more about the Dr’s I’ve mentioned
http://stephenporges.com
http://neurosculptinginstitute.com
http://mindsightinstitute.com
Feel stuck in life? Check out my bespoke personal development program.
Greatness awaits!
